Some news and a post...

I have some good news. I will actually be doing some training's in June. The first will be on June 12th. That one is actually another volunteer's but I am helping and getting my feet wet. It will be about brushing your teeth and washing your hands. It's for children. Then, about a week later, I am planning to do a training on nutrition and cooking. I'm very excited! It will be a good way to introduce some new things to people and the promise of free food usually guarantees a good turnout. Somethings are universal. When they are done I'll of course write about them.

And here's the new post:

One of the weirdest things about the Peace Corps experience is the extreme ends of privacy a volunteer experiences. There are many times when it can feel like you can't get any privacy at all. Other times you have never been more alone in your life. Both are a wonderful part of all of this and a struggle.

The lack of privacy sometimes could definitely be a problem if you lack patience or have the wrong mindset. For instance, if my door is open, people are constantly coming in to visit. No matter what I might be doing or how busy I might be. Sometimes the door is open to get some airflow through my house on a hot day but it is an open invitation to come visit as well. The culture here is one of many, sometimes daily, visits and a lot of small talk. It is both great and can be stifling. It's great because it is very easy to make friends and practice speaking because I am constantly talking with people. I genuinely like the visits. They are born from both curiosity about the new, huge white man in the village and respect and friendship. But the concept of personal space is very different here than in America. It is one of the big cultural differences I have noticed. When people visit I might be preparing a meal or in the middle of studying or writing but that doesn't matter. They come right in, sit down next to you, check out what you are doing, and get right to hanging out. In the Malagasy culture there is always time to small talk with a friend and neighbor. It is a wonderful way to be but it takes getting used to coming from the US where it can feel like you should always be doing something and where a persons personal space and home are mostly entered by those that are close to them. It's best to take it all in stride and use it as a learning experience. Another good example is that one of the favorite past times of the neighborhood children is to stand outside my window and stare at me while they whisper to each other. They are just curious but that can of course be annoying. I often invite them in to color pictures but that is only a quick distraction. Plus I am rapidly running out of wall space to hang the pictures and coloring books. And if I say I am busy the usually leave but always come back soon to stare some more. I am still getting used to that.

The other side of the coin is the loneliness. Of course on one level it comes from being the only American in town and having to communicate in a language you barely speak. That can be overwhelming and very draining. I find that it's important to take time for myself every day to just chill. Most of the time I read or watch movies on my computer but even staring at the ceiling helps. I am also lucky because there is a volunteer 7km away from me in the town I have to go to for the market. I see her a couple times a week and that helps recharge the batteries too. Some other volunteers aren't so lucky. It can be nicer than you would ever imagine to have a conversation in your native language. I continue to gain respect here for people living in a country that doesn't use their native language or who speak more than two languages. The other level of loneliness for me is literally being alone many times during the day. As often as I am swamped by visitors I find myself very alone. Especially during the day when people are working and the children are at school. I almost miss all the faces peering in my window...almost. For me that is a very new experience. Before this I had never lived by myself. And even here my house is attached to a family so I am not really on my own. Again, some others have it worse. But I am still not used to all the alone time. It feels stupid to complain about being alone when I just said I take time for myself everyday but it is very different when you choose the loneliness and when it is forced on you. The good thing is I'm reading my butt off. I'm going to be extremely well read after this. It also gives me time to study up on both my technical manuals and language. I try to be productive during my loneliness. Sometimes I am even successful.

I guess the best part about the extremes is I'm learning so much about myself. I can't run or hide from myself during the lonely times and the constant interaction with new people from a different culture is teaching me so many awesome things.